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October, 30th 2007

Democratic debate: The End

– Liz Mair

This 30 second quickfire round thing is a bit of a joke, isn't it? No one is actually being teleported off the stage if they run over, there are no puffs of smoke, and no amusing noises to accompany candidates not disappearing from the stage. But, Brian Williams is going to get tougher on enforcing the cut-off time, so OK, I'll keep playing along.

Dodd is wasting time by telling us he has 30 seconds to talk about attracting people into medicine. He makes the cutoff point.

Biden thinks doctors graduate with too much debt, and they should get to write it off if they do public service, and thinks insurance companies are too Big Brother. Biden stays within his time.

Edwards wants universal care, and there's a nursing crisis. He wants to eliminate mandatory over time. He makes his cutoff.

Hillary want to give insurance companies an ultimatum. I bet she'll give them an ultimatum, all right. She's run over, however. Bam, she's outta here!

Obama's concerned about Medicare and Medicaid reimbursement levels, and college costs. He's met the cutoff.

Kucinich is on about the American NHS again. Surprise, surprise. He's over time, by quite a bit. Double blam, he's gone!

Richardson wants government to pay for two years of college in exchange for one year of public service. He's totally going to run over. Yes... he's teleporting away, as I type.

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We're talking airplanes. Why does this keep coming up in debates? I fly a lot, and yes, it sucks, but flying has, in my 29 years of experience, always sucked. Since when are we replacing talking more about taxes or health care with talking about planes? My God. I'm not even bothering summarizing answers on this ridiculously specific and pointed subject.

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Hillary wants to give drivers' licenses to illegals. Dirty hippie. Just joking. I don't really have an issue with illegals having drivers' licenses as long as they aren't substitutes for Social Security cards, green cards, passports, or whatever, and as long as getting one doesn't get the holders automatically placed on the electoral rolls. Wait, now Hillary doesn't want illegals to have drivers' licenses, and that's not what she said, but she did, and she's having a bitchfight with Dodd over it. How bizarre. Why in God's name is she engaging Chris Dodd? Why on this totally small insignificant issue?

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Edwards wants to censor the internet for kids. But he really wants to talk about Hillary saying one thing on drivers' licenses one minute, and another the next. He's concerned about her doubletalk. Who's not?

Obama can't tell if Hillary's for or against drivers' licenses for illegals. It is INSANE that her wading into this particular issue is what's tripping her up in this debate. People are going to take away from this debate that she can't even give a straight answer and avoid flip-flopping in the course of two minutes when talking about a tiny little issue.

OMG, Russert's asking Kucinich about the UFO. And he's saying he saw it, but not that it was necessarily an alien craft. He's going to move his campaign office to Roswell-- that's a pretty awesome line, actually. 14% of Americans think they've seen UFOs, too.

Now Obama has to answer a question about aliens. He must really be wondering what the hell he's doing running for president now.

Hillary avoids a UFO question. Too bad. That could have really killed her off! Instead, we get more platitudes and Bush backing, this time on the subject of cancer. Not that that's not important, but I actually would find her views on UFOs more interesting.

Dodd wants to decriminalize pot. Edwards, Hillary and someone else (Obama?) don't.

Biden would shut down China! And he's back on Rudy again, this time with the UFOs.

Obama's Halloween costume? His kids are going as a mad professor and a witch, he may go as Mitt Romney, in a two-faced mask! Fine family fun, all around!

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